Why Do Men Read Text and Ignore

When I met my ex narcissist I knew inside two weeks that "something was off." Subsequently being in regular contact for days, all suddenly he was out of contact, and I had this overwhelming feeling that something was non right.

Then bear witness appeared that he was in fact lying to me – but I dismissed it.

My intuition was trying to guide me to safety, but instead I chose non listen, I chose to ignore the messages and rationalise the ruddy flags that were staring me in the face up.

Sound familiar?

Nearly everyone that suffers a narcissistic relationship felt like something was off and something wasn't right but chose not to listen to the message their intuition was telling them.

Equally you lot are probably enlightened, losing faith in your intuition can have horrific repercussions.

In this commodity I am going to explicate how we become disconnected and lose trust in our intuition, and how yous can identify this and work on connecting to your internal navigation system that is guiding you lot on the path to wellbeing and truth that honours not only you just all of life as well.

To empathise the dynamic of our intuition – we demand to realise that intuition and emotions are extremely connected, and when we are emotionally closed off from ourselves, and focused on gaining 'data' from exterior of ourself we are not at one with our ain intuition.

This can occur in any expanse of our life.

For example you may have a gut feeling to boring down in the car, dismiss it and around the corner is a law machine. You may have a feeling to take a certain particular with y'all when you leave the house, and don't. Later on you find you needed it.

A few weeks ago a girlfriend joined me for a walk on the beach, and had a feeling not to stay long. She said nix well-nigh this and we enjoyed a lovely long walk. Then rangers turned up and booked her dog for beingness subsequently hours on the beach (neither of us were aware of the time curfew).

She kicked herself subsequently for not honouring her intuition.

It may seem logical that we would receive these messages of 'wellbeing' in our deepest times of need. Life and Law of Attraction simply does not work like that. You attract everything which is a friction match to your emotional country. This includes the 'letters' which are at that place to assist and aid you. The more yous piece of work on getting your emotional vibration sorted the more powerful, clear and 'real' intuitive messages become.

The call of your soul – divine guidance – becomes more and more crystal clear the more loving, accepting, clear and clean your own emotional country and connection to yourself becomes.

It is incredible how many people at the commencement of their narcissistic relationship had clear warning signs that there was something non right with this person. Something that was 'off' that only did not gel – and in that location was probably some huge cherry flags show upwardly very early that were dismissed.

The truth was our intuition was screaming at us – simply nosotros rationalised it away. Later when it was too late and we were already enmeshed we so no idea what our intuition was, what had now get 'our fault', what was upwards, down, sideways, real, fictitious or fifty-fifty sane.

Information technology stands to reason that the more and more we got disconnected from ourselves, and the more the pain of egotistic abuse escalates, the less and less we were aligned with our inner wisdom.

How Co-dependency Disconnects You From Your Intuition

Co-dependency is a focus on the exterior of ourself. Information technology is an endeavor through trying to ready and command conditions on the exterior to feel at-home and peaceful on the within.

Co-dependency as per concluding week's article can be closely linked with self-avoidance and / or obsessive / compulsive behaviours. This creates a difficulty to manage, exist with and navigate our pain and emotions. It creates a huge difficulty in beingness with, listening to and trusting ourself.

It makes information technology feel about impossible to take activeness which would honor and take care of ourself.

The angle of approaching life from the outside in has the power to be an Effective Creator back the front end. The truth is we are always creating life from the within out – whether we are conscious of this or not.

If we are connected to our inner being we are unfolding with life as our authentic self. We are not looking out into life, reading it attentively asking 'How do I appeal, approach, what practice I say practise or feign in order to exist loved, accepted and worthy?' Nosotros don't try to read everyone else'due south feedback to base our 'self' upon.

This is powerless egoic, fearful living, and is a complete disconnection from intuition.

Many people think narcissists are highly intuitive. Being an energy vampire and adept at reading body linguistic communication to secure and regulate narcissistic supply is not a connexion to ane's inner being.

Narcissists are famous for 'reading their environment' and interim on it in egoic ways. This translates every bit extreme fear and umbrage to any perceived slight which threatens the image of the Fake Cocky non beingness as wonderful and as flawless as the narcissist would similar information technology to exist. Equally soon as this narcissistic injury occurs (as per the narcissist'southward intense monitoring of 'the outside' whilst measuring narcissistic supply) the narcissist will immediately human activity out sabotage, one-upmanship, tit for tat, projection or pay-dorsum.

None of the narcissist'due south deportment are coming from infinite connection to inner wisdom (intuition) – information technology all erupts from fearful and limited egoic intelligence.

If we are continued to our inner being nosotros simply show up every bit existence ourself. Nosotros trust ourself, our emotions and what we feel within ourself.

The beautiful thing most intuition is that your space inner self (the not-physical Source part of y'all) works magnificently for the adept of all. Your inner self knows how to evangelize messages that not merely honour y'all, but accolade life. When yous are yourself authentically in life, you not but heighten yourself, y'all benefit everything and ever one else as well.

For instance, information technology would exist wonderful personal growth feedback to an abuser if y'all honoured your intuition and pulled abroad instead of believing lies and staying attached.

Could you imagine how pathological liars would have to align with truthfulness if everyone in their feel honoured intuition and acted on I'1000 not taking this whatever further considering I sense yous are not-authentic and a relationship with you is not going to be healthy for me?

How We Started to Disconnect From Our Intuition

The disconnection from our intuition started from a very young age.

For case we may accept known that there was something wrong in our family unit – yet our mother and begetter lied to us – they told us a different version from what was really happening. We knew the truth deep inside of the states, yet our parents (our authorities at that historic period) told us something dissimilar and as a result we started to distrust ourself. In fact the information we felt and the 'reality' nosotros were told were completely different stories.

So nosotros 'learnt' that our gut was wrong.

Additionally if we were not taught to believe in ourself, trust ourself and that our feelings and thoughts were valid or worthy – why would we believe in our inner feelings?

Not beingness emotionally authentic is disastrous for children and breeds co-dependency horrifically. In fact many psychological studies have uncovered that families that were honest, even if farthermost trauma occurred, created much healthier children than when lies prevailed, even when conditions were nowhere about as abusive.

Lying destroys trust not just inside all relationships, merely within individual's emotional and mental psyches. Specially when lies are delivered from people believed to be trustworthy (which is what every child naturally instinctively desires as a bond with a parent).

As a parent I tin't urge you enough to be emotionally authentic with your children. Tell them the truth about what is going on for you and how you feel. Allow them to understand that emotions are real, and show them you are able to be vulnerable, deplorable, mad and upset. Ain and take responsibility for your emotions and let you children to see y'all practice this.

Don't deny your emotions or blame other people for them. Let you lot children to know y'all are perfectly imperfect and there are things you work on within yourself in society to personally grow, heal and improve. Be humble, real and vulnerable when you make mistakes. Let them know that this is perfectly normal and adequate to do, and show them that you dear and take yourself at these times.

Don't lie or embrace upwards your emotions and who you actually are with your children, thinking you are protecting them – because you are not.

You could exist destroying non just their connection and trust with you – merely more greatly with themself.

Losing a connection to our intuition was the enormous price many of us experienced as children. When children learnt to distrust their inner cocky, they asunder from inner wisdom, inner guidance and became more and more reliant on focusing on the outside to survive.

This is what losing one's self is.

This outer focus creates one of two conditions – co-dependency or narcissism. Both are a condition of disconnection from ane's inner self.

The co-dependent feels unable to be a source to self and clings to people on the outside to provide that and will tolerate beingness abused whilst 'clinging', and the narcissist controls people through pathological manipulation and keeping the upper mitt as an attempt to avert inner powerlessness and worthlessness.

This is why it is so important to operate with emotional authenticity with your children, so that yous exercise empower them to take and connect to their emotions and trust and deeply partner themself.

Then they volition non accept to crash and burn as adults (as we accept) in order to create a connectedness back to themselves – they will have inherently established it.

Losing Your Intuition During Narcissistic Abuse

As co-dependents nosotros accept a loftier sense of integrity and conscience and we certainly did not desire to practise the wrong matter by other people.

Considering nosotros are a 'skillful people' it is extremely hard to fathom a grown adult, who appears so honest and trustworthy, would be capable of pathological lying, or keeping exes on the hook, or sleeping with other people whilst courtship us, or telling us and other people what everyone wants to hear so they can fulfil their fantasies of grandiosity.

We cannot fathom how someone could acquit like that or do all the other things that narcissists are famous for doing.

So rather than trust our gut 'something is non adding up hither', our 'decent' model of the world kicks in and we can't even believe that such thoughts could cantankerous our mind.

When the warning signs announced, even if we get-go getting evidence of what nosotros suspected, and even when other people start supplying evidence near this – nosotros listen to the narcissist'south versions which discredit the other person, and make her or him out to exist pathological and warped instead.

We want to believe that this seemingly 'divine' person who has appeared in our life is existent, and we ignore the fact that where there is fume there is often fire and even when lies are exposed we buy the excuses for them.

It is only much later down the rail when more horrendous, pathological or cheating behaviour is exposed that we can wait back at all the early events and they all add up. The narcissist e'er was a chameleon, was non to be trusted and never had anyone's best interests at heart (anybody was only an object to garnish narcissistic supply from) and our intuition was screaming this at us correct from the start.

What we did is simply follow the patterns we learnt at a very immature age – which was non to trust our inner voice and to permit the navigation of our life past other authorities outside of us. Specially the 'government' that nosotros want to trust and dearest the most. Nosotros put the creation of our life in other people's easily rather than being the authority for this creation ourself.

Past dismissing our inner feelings (sometimes massive warning bells) and looking to the outside earth for our data we disconnected from ourself and became more and more powerless.

We then lost command of our own emotions and allowed ourselves to be controlled by everyone else's instead.

Then we fruitlessly held these people responsible for our own emotional country.

We were easily talked out of our feelings. We were able to be set as 'paranoid', 'wrong to be untrustworthy' or 'bad people' for wanting answers or accountability for what our emotions were telling us which was: 'I am dangerous, I am being lied to, you are not who you profess to be'…and we stayed hooked trying to testify that we were good people who were worthy of being loved.

Then we felt guilty and 'bad' for thinking such things, easily accepted the blame (me existence the style I am makes you behave like that) and became incredible confused and blind sighted.

What nosotros didn't realise is that information technology is impossible to prove to a narcissist that you lot are worth loving, when they possess no inner resources to know their own or anyone else'due south worthiness.

Our gaps every bit co-dependents tin can exist played on horrifically. The narcissist knows where you doubt yourself, where you will err towards loyalty for the relationship, how you tin easily exist fabricated to experience guilty, how you wish to seek blessing, and how you will defend you beliefs on integrity and are devastated if suggested it is you doing the pathological, horrendous, maliscious things that the narcissist does.

The narcissist knows how easy it is to talk yous out of trusting and backing yourself.

At this point you oasis't connected enough to your ain inner resources, or partnered yourself enough to exist in the free energy statement or knowing that y'all are worth loving. You need to empathize this must emanate from you in order to exist reflected back to you from life.

Staying attached to abuse, rather than connecting to your inner land, ways that you will receive the results of non knowing and living the truth that yous are worth loving. In stark contrast when you lot practise know you are worth loving you volition never tolerate pathological or abusive behaviour once more.

The truth is if we have not done the inner work on ourself and learnt how to partner with our inner self and with life directly we do non experience connected to our inner navigation system. We practice not feel worthy and whole and we are not in our power.

It is interesting how many intuitives and healers become involved with narcissists, and it is astonishing how many of these individuals accept powerful intuition for other people – amazingly so – notwithstanding have such a struggle to trust their own internal guidance for themselves.

This is a classic and circuitous problem with many sensitive people who are empaths and who give of themselves to others. If they are not in their ain emotional power for themselves they are targets for narcissists who are often drawn to have 'the calorie-free' of these people'south energy simply because narcissist's have no ability to produce their own good feelings. All of it must come from external sources.

How to Heal and Reconnect to Your Intition

So how do you turn information technology all around?

You plow it around by creating an authentic relationship with yourself.

Yous need to understand that when you lot are total of fright and pain you truly take no idea as to what is real in the moment or not. You turn to your heed and the exterior to try to work out the 'truth' instead of deeply listening to yourself.

If you are 2d time around with a narcissist, you may start seeing and nigh importantly feeling the correlations and the warning signs once more, but then dismiss them thinking 'I am just paranoid because of what happened last time'…and then even when y'all start seeing lack of accountability and projections and even horrendous behaviour y'all may still look for and accept excuses.

This is common if yous are not connected to your inner self and if you have allowed yourself to be pulled more and more out of your power.

All of this is letting y'all know that it is incredibly important to work at your healing journeying inside. To partner yourself, to love and accept yourself wounds and all. This means knowing yourself, trusting yourself, and becoming a solid source of your own wellbeing.

And then you will know and trust your internal navigation system which is e'er positioned to grant you emotional feedback about the truth of your life and steer you towards true and healthy experiences.

The experiences that are a match for the inherent wellbeing of your inner self, Source and life.

I'd love to hear your feedback well-nigh this commodity.

swansonsheand.blogspot.com

Source: https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/why-did-we-ignore-the-red-flags-of-the-narcissist/

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